Pat TIllman

I just watched the documentary on the death of Pat Tillman and the cover-up that followed. I think its awful that the government can choose to contain whatever information they want from the Americans. And that they would use Pat Tillman's death as a opportunity to recruit others because of his "heroism." I know that I could not handle all the information the government knows, but covering up the causes of a son's death from his family is inexcusable.

Quarterly

This week I read 324 pages, making my semester total 2506 pages.

This quarter I have read some interesting books by some new authors. I ventured out and read a Nora Roberts, Francine Rivers and some non-fiction as well. I realized, although I already kinda knew, that I am definitely not a non-fiction type person. I also got a look into the rights of African Americans by reading The Help, a book which I enjoyed very much. Still haven't had time to see the movie though. I usually find myself reading at night, as soon as I catch up with my reading for novels. And i spend almost every friday and saturday night babysitting, so I read a lot once the kids go to bed. The reactions from the parents to the books I am reading is quite entertaining. Sometimes they have read the book and jump right in with Oh how do you like it? I liked this, this and this about it. When they saw I was reading Crime and Punishment for Novels, they were kind of worried about my mental state, until I told them it was for a class. Most of all, I think they are just impressed that a high schooler would bring a thick book to read instead of normal babysitting behaviors, like texting all night or watching tv. It just seems to be the perfect time to get some reading in for the week.

Believing the Worst

Well, since I didn't have to go to school yesterday, i made a lot of progress in my book and finally finished it today in my car as i waited before key club started. The pastor did end up repenting and seeing that all he was doing was to glorify himself instead of God. The problem was that it took 400 pages, including his wife walking in on his affair, his father dying, his son moving across the country, his mother staying distant, and the loss of all his friends for him to even consider that he might have done something wrong. And after those LONG 400 pages, there was a small 25 pages that detailed how he repented and got his wife to come home and asked for forgiveness of all the people he had wronged. classic story book ending. I was just really disappointed in the fact that there was almost no description as to how his heart changed and I didn't really feel like it did. I felt like his wife was just submissive as she had been the whole novel and went back to him. And that the forgiveness he asked for from all of his friends was just an act. Maybe thats because i tend to believe the worst in people, and i just wasnt convinced of his "volte-face' HAHA etymology word! Bonus point!
On the topic of believing the worst in people, I just want to clarify a little. I am all for forgiveness and such but this week has just been awful when it comes to people. My counselor is totally giving me the cold shoulder and hasn't contacted me back in over a week, despite my constant nags. One of my good guy friends decided to yell at me in public for something that didn't even matter, and still hasn't apologized. One of the guys that i liked for almost 3 years decided to get in contact with a girl that goes to my church and i'm super freaked out that he's just gonna show up one day. and my best friend's teacher is refusing to give her any help when her grade is slipping and she has done nothing but try her best from day 1. Bottom line: people just frustrate me sometimes. and i'm sure I frustrate people sometimes, but seriously. People just need to be nice. Because going off on someone gets you nowhere, it only adds more unneeded tension and stresses you out.

Developing the Preacher

I have continued to read And the Shofar Blew with much interest. I know that I had been hoping for a change in the preacher, but one just hasn't come yet. He has actually gotten progressively worse! It just makes me so angry and I want to go scream in his face myself and tell him to get a clue! But I have a feeling he wouldn't even care. Plus, he is a fictional character and nothing I say can change the course of the already written book.

My mom says that sometimes a loved one does all they can to get through to someone, but it just doesn't work. God has a plan for them and he, in his time, will make the person see the light and realize the wrong they have been doing. But only he can control this. I feel like this is definitely what is going on in this book. His poor wife can only say so much, but he refuses to listen to any of it. He just doesn't believe he has done any wrong and that it is all his wife's fault. Stupid boys.

If this book doesn't end with a change in his heart, I am going to be devastated. There are these darling old people in the novel who have befriended the wife and son, and are trying to do the same with the preacher, but just haven't gotten through. Nice old people just make my day. I worked the band competition this last weekend and had two senior citizens come through with this supposed "senior pass" that isn't even real. They had to be 90+ years old. They were holding hands and walking in to see their grandchild perform. We let them in for free and it was just so cute. It gives me hope that love can last forever and I just hope that my husband and I can last that long and still want to hold each other's hand.

Currently

I am now reading And the Shofar Blew by Francine Rivers. I read 155 pages this week, making my total for the semester 2182 pages. Here are my favorite sentences from the quarter.

1. "She doesn't like me to put her down outside. Especially when... other d-o-g-s are around."

This sentence is from The Search and I just have to laugh every time I read it. People's treatment of their dogs can be so over the top and I want my dog to interact with other dogs, not be terrified of even hearing the word "dog."

2. "My job description was twofold: 1) Save lives and 2) Take lives. Not necessarily in that order."

This is from Joker One and I like the sentence just because it makes me think about things I don't like to think about. Murder. Death. Guns. Or all of the above.

3. "Wasn't that the point of the book? For women to realize, we are just two people. Not that much separates us. Not nearly as much as i'd thought."

This is from The Help and I just love the idea of women in the times of slavery realizing the fact that should have been obvious to everyone. Color doesn't matter; we are all human beings.

Shofar Blowing

Well, I decided that the Assassin's Gallery was a little too boring for me. Maybe it would have gotten good eventually, but a book needs to take off from the beginning for me, or I never gain interest. I picked another Francine Rivers book called And the Shofar Blew and have fallen in love yet again. This one is about a man who is called to move and be a preacher at a broken, old people's church with less than 50 members. When he arrives, he starts trying to build the church up to meet his dad's extremely high expectations. But along the way, he treats his wife and child like dirt and completely takes himself out of their lives, submerged himself in his preacher duties. He also refuses to listen to anything the elders say, which results in their leaving the church.

The cover has a picture of this bugle looking thing, which i'm guessing is the shofar. I don't really know how the title is going to play into the book. I just went and saw the movie Courageous. For those of you who haven't heard of it, it is about 5 men who commit themselves to being the best fathers they can be. They each have their own problems that make them realize how much God is in control and how they need to make the most of the time they have with their children. These men are police officers and experience violence on a day to day basis. Most of the felons didn't have a positive father figure in their lives, which is what makes the men want their children to have an exceptional father. Connecting that movie with the horrible father figure in this preacher just depresses me because he doesn't know how much of an impact his absence has on his kid. I can only hope that throughout the novel God is going to change his heart and make him realize that his wife and son are most important and that the number attending the church matters nothing if they do not have strong beliefs.

Plotting

I've started a new book this week called The Assassins Gallery. The book starts with a chilling, gruesome murder of two CoastGuard members at 4am. I'm only about 50 pages into the novel, but it seems like the book is going to be about terrorism. One man is in charge of training spies to go over to America. But while he is training, there is also a secret mission going on at the same time. I love mystery novels but I feel like this one is about to go into the government and political hierarchy and it may get kind of confusing and boring. I absolutely HATE politics. They are a complete waste of time to discuss and the two parties, well those are a joke. Any person can stand for whatever they want on any particular issue. Just because your "party" normally votes one way doesn't automatically solidify your beliefs in that area. I just think debating all that nonsense is pointless, because in the end, the people in office get to make the decisions. Us back at home complaining isn't going to change it except for the one time of year where we get to vote, and most of us aren't 18 anyways, so we truly can't change anything.

This may be weird, but I find people's motives for killing other people interesting. I like to take a peek inside their brains and just see how they see the world. And see their way of handling issues and how they justify themselves so that they can sleep at night. I know that I myself could never bring myself to kill a person, so the motivations behind other people's attacks interest me. And assassins do this for a living! Where this book will take me, i'm not really sure, but i'm still looking for a book to do my book talk on, so maybe this one will be worthy. I'm not about to waste my valuable time making a movie for a book that no one else should waste their time reading. That defeats the whole purpose of the assignment. And if the books stinks, well, i'll just drop it and find another. There's too many books out there to settle for a lousy one. This theory works for men too :)